Coming out of the RER this morning, I heard the following announcement: "Your attention please. It is forbidden to use bicycles and rollers in this train station."

At first, I didn't quite pick up on what was bothering me. As I approached my office, it struck me: The word "rollers" does not exist in English!

This is a classic case of a "faux ami", or false friend (lingually speaking), and it is something I regularly have difficulty with. For example, a meeting with a business partner just a few days ago fell through because we arranged to meet in the "AM". Which in English means morning ... but in french means afternoon.

The attraction of false friends is a nasty condition, which unfortunately only gets worse as you become more bilingual. While your brain becomes pretty smart at recognising words from two languages and integrating them seamlessly, it forgets completely about the non-bilingual person you are talking to ... who may, in a pathological scenario of statistically perfect bilinguicity (ok, that word exists neither in English or French), only recognise 1 out of every 2 words you are saying.

But the situation can be even worse, and give rise to what I will call a "false cousin" - a false friend once removed. Lets look at the phrase from the RER this morning again: "Your attention please. It is forbidden to use bicycles and rollers in this train station." The word "rollers" is a false friend, because while it is perfectly clear to French speakers, and seems like it should have meaning in English, it doesn't. But it is also a false cousing, because it sounds like something else which does have meaning in English, and is relevant to the context. In this case, "stroller", which is a (American, I believe) word for a type of pram, or in french "landau" or "poussette". Imagine that you are a fertile woman visiting Paris with your infant children. You here this announcement partially over the speakers, and the only meaning you can extract is that your stroller or pram is forbidden. Not just a false friend or cousin, but a particulary nasty and confusing one.

But why broach this subject on a technology teaching blog, you may ask? Well, very simply because I see a profusion of false friends - and worse - false cousins every day in the English writings of my students. While the occasional spelling or grammar mistake, or use of a false friend is forgivable, when false cousins, or totally incorrect grammar creep into a presentation or report, the situation is far more serious, because the meaning of the message is lost or twisted.

To all students: Please pay attention to your friends and cousins ... :) Seriously, re-read your documents, have them read by friends and family, before handing them in. Mistakes can be harmless, some can be amusing, but others can be extremely confusing and academically damaging.

 jTf